The Mother’s Meditation

I’ve been testing out some parenting “methods” that entail the loss of psychopathic rage thoughts towards child. They harbour a wisdom and a complete absolving yourself of irritation. Funny though, it doesn’t feel like a method at all. I’ve tried methods and it seems that the children always sensed my desire to manipulate through these methods. I would try A to get one of them to do B and then move on to C when A failed.
Well, it seems I’ve managed to happily let that go. More and more of the time at least. Practice makes parenting.
How did I come to this place? I’m thinking it’s through the persistent work of aiming to embody peaceful parentingness? Holding the space for that and knowing it’s possibility even when I have failed? Setting the intention for it after a major parenting struggle? Seeking, searching, letting it through.
Yes. All of that.
I’ve led myself to some unexpected places lately and it’s been exhilarating and enlightening to the point that I dare call it easy.
Maybe you can relate to this child/parent scenario?
Child is extremely tired with some sort of ailment that is preventing sleep. This time it was a stuffy nose. The familiar and nasally “My nose is plugged!!!” Set in.
I took a deep breath because I knew what this meant, or could mean.
I began to play the game as usual offering essential oils, saline and thoughts of smothering to sleep. Then I stopped. I remembered that I’m no longer doing that anymore. I have a bigger, deeper purpose.
I rubbed the child’s back and took deep cleansing breaths which aided in the clearing of my mind. What happened next is what I have been intending for: The Mother’s Meditation. I had been knowing for myself that a walking, screaming, pooping meditation was possible while with children. I knew it could be more than needing a quiet rare space to be spiritual and peaceful. I could find this place among the “unpleasant” chaos. I continued to breathe and take note of what the irritation felt like in my chest and my toes. I breathed it in deeply wrapping it up in love and accepting it completely. “This is me right now. What wants to happen?”
And then I led us to a beach. I love beaches. I began to tell the child what the beach felt like. The warm sand, the salty wet air. It led us up to the waves where we saw crabs. We waded forward through the water and we grew fins where we had legs. Our fingers became webbed and we swam to great depths. Sleep came easily during this and I’ve been using I since with this child.
Now I’m not suggesting You use this method. This mediation spurred out of a genuine desire to help and be at peace with what is. It’s about letting yourself go to those places and explore. What depths do you contain? That’s what to strive for. It’s exciting to think of what wants to come through you. Yours may look differently or maybe you’d take a walk through a forest? Who knows?!?? Life is exciting.

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