Attachment Parenting Is Not Hands Off Off Off!!! Dealing with criticism…

Yesterday I received my first criticism from one of my posts! Oh, isn’t that exciting!?!!
It was from the post How Will They Ever Learn. The criticism came from someone I know personally, my friend’s mother. She sent me a fb message, in point form of instances when my children had almost gotten hurt or when they were disrespectful or “aggressive” towards another child, etc.
She was very emphatic with her use of capital letters and exclamation points. She told me that it was not just her opinion but others too.
Shall I scream this once more for all the Attachment Parents out there? I’ll yell it down the mountain
“Attachment parenting is not hands-off off off off off!”
The fb message had me in tears immediately after. My thoughts were
“Nobody understands that I am raising children with love and security.”
sob sob.
But I am not going to go into a defense of why I am a good parent or why attachment parenting is important. We already know that.
I want to talk about what I learned from this, from dealing with criticism.
I was crying on the phone to my own mother and then I remembered, something good will come from this.
I took a deep breath, and thought that if I can handle criticism from someone I know, then it will be easy when it starts coming in on my blog.
I am so grateful for that experience!
Something that gets me emotional always indicates to me where I can improve.
I decided that I can be even more mindful of what I say about other people, especially behind their backs. ESPECIALLY, about other people’s parenting. It can be so exhausting and lonely. I will always offer my kind and gentle parenting advice directly to them and only when they ask for it.
I can be more compassionate and understanding, we are all doing our best!
Another thing has also solidified in me… I hear many people say that they want to live in community with people. I think this feeling of community can be in our hearts and in our actions. I need to up my efforts to be watching out and caring for other people’s children as well as my own. I will be looking out even more, for all people!
I think I’ll end this with another tired saying:
It takes a village.


4 responses »

  1. I’m sorry that woman did that.

    Parenting is the hardest thing in the world. My parents don’t understand what I do at all. When I was a kid I was barely paid any attention to. Maybe AP makes the older generation feel bad?

  2. As mothers we do the best we can do with the tools we have at the time…..back in the day when she was a young mother, she probably did not have the tools or community that we now have, so she probably feels badly about choices she made, and now she is choosing to take it out on you…, remember that she is probably fighting her own personal battle or 7 or 29, and just keep on keeping on!

    • We are all fighting our battles right? I am aiming to let go and let be. That kinda looks like not fighting! It also means not making excuses for people, possibly her love and care is just
      Misguided? We seriously need to learn how to communicate as a
      Society 😛

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